I was being interviewed by the BBC World Service today for a show called ‘How to Quit’.
A 15 minute interview which cut right to the point with the first question - is quitting a luxury item?
I am often asked about changing career being a middle class indulgence and challenged that most people cant afford to change jobs, but this isn’t quite true.
In fact your middle class (any class actually) lifestyle might be exactly the thing that keeps you in place. Your fear about what you think you have to lose v what you have to gain is often overshadowed by your lifestyle choices.
Your mortgage, not being able to have all inclusive holidays and upgrading your next car are often cited as reasons that mean someone stays in the job they aren’t loving.
Other reasons include what other people might think (or do think), the fear of failure and having to start all over again.
In professions that required years of study, or you’ve built up your career network, sunken cost fallacy holds you in place - you’ve come this far, to throw it all away? For what?
And it’s the For What? that is the crucial question.
For What?
Why do you want to quit your job?
You want something to be better?
You are miserable?
It’s toxic.
It’s dull.
You are bored of it.
You have different values now?
You have to start with a deep integration of that question - Why do I WANT to quit my job? and then the question Why do I NEED to quit my job?
Two different questions, with very different answers.
One set of answers could be considered a luxury, an indulgence, maybe, but then so what?
One set of answers is very far from a luxury. It’s a necessity. You have to.
So when you get to that place the next question is How?
How to quit?
Well I don’t think I came close in answering that question in a 15 minute interview, so I’ve started a deeper blog about it on Another Door. I might even make the title of a workshop. Feels like there is a lot of curiosity around quitting but also a lot of hesitating and uncertainty.
The thing I can share right now is - it is not one workshop, one interview, one book or one thing that will help you make the decision.
Quitting your job has many layers, decisions, setbacks, excitement, meanders to deal with. It is not one decision. Once you know that, you can take the pressure off yourself.
You wont get the Right answer today or tomorrow.
You’ll get the next step you are willing to try.
And then the next step, and the next step.
So is Quitting (your job) a luxury?
That depends why you want and need to quit.
And your why is not dependant on circumstance, background, history, education or class - it’s all about how much you NEED the change, how much you WANT the change and what you are prepared to do to make it happen.
So yes it might be a luxury item, but then so what, we all indulgence is luxury items, why not indulge in the thing that will make your life better?
But also it might be very far from luxury - you need to change, it is no longer serving you.
Just my thoughts.
What do you think?
Is quitting a luxury? (And maybe there is a better new word for it than Quit-uxury - sorry best I could do)
eleanor
I think it depends on why you are quitting and what other factors are around you. If you have no job or next step plans to go to then I think it is a luxury that many could not afford (especially if you are your household's only bread winner). However if your mental health is suffering then it could be considered a necessity.
so far:
- I’ve quit (resigned from) 5 permanent, ‘professional’ jobs; always for another permanent, professional job that I’ve already signed a contract for … some of them were great, career- / life-changing moves; some of them were not great moves that were not great for my career / bank balance / life.
- I’ve been made redundant from 2 permanent, professional jobs; one towards the start of my career that effectively ‘made’ my career - and although I was actively taking steps to leave and start on my own, which is what I did, I quite probably would never have done so; one much later, which caused me to turn my back on the corporate world for 3-4 years and take a unique, experiential role (which I’ve recently moved on from, back into the corporate world).
learnings / thoughts: that’s a much longer, more subjective post!