Yesterday I took my daughter to a climbing wall (for fun 00)
She had a lesson with 5 other children.
I was in awe watching her climbing right to the top of each wall, and doing the para-stepping back down.
She was the only one to get right to the top, the others got half way, or to a ledge, and then said they were good to come back down.
Afterwards I asked her if she enjoyed it. “Sort of, but I was really scared” she shared. I asked her why she kept going to the top? “I was I a bit worried about what the man ( instructor) would think.”
That took me back a bit.
We talked about why you can always say no, or you don’t want to do something without worrying about anybody else.
But then also made me think about the thin line of encouragement, coaching, progressing to go further.
And made me think were the other children the brave ones saying they were done and ready to come down?
Or did they give up too soon, unbothered by the instructor supporting them to push themselves.
My daughter also said she’d like to go again, and keeping going to get better.
So it made me think about our limits.
When we decide what our limits are.
That we are always capable of a bit more than we think, but also that we know when we’ve reached our limits.
Limits are very different to capability.
You are definitely always capable of more than you think.
So sometimes we do need a bit of external encouragement to keep pushing us.
But it’s you that gets to set your limit. And your limit is always your limit, when you say so.
So, the challenge is how do you set your limits? (Hopefully not based on the worry of what someone might think, unless that someone is you?).
eleanor
my limits are about Want, Need and Cumulative Capacity … it’s a combination of the three, and I sometimes don’t get it right haha … and the line between other’s Wants & Needs and my own is (inevitably?) sometimes a problem for me, and sometimes a joy (in terms of helping others) … our limits have levels / thresholds that are personal to us … the impact of passing through different levels / thresholds is different, for each one, and for each of us (presumably) … my tendency is to push those limits sometimes, more than is good for me … although I suspect many of us do …