A strange thing happened a few weeks ago.
Someone dropped me a note about something, and I agreed to help out, but I didn’t really want, but thought it was the right thing, and kind thing to do.
It was a bit of a hassle. Juggling childcare to fit around it, moving some other meetings.
Then the week after they dropped me another note and offered to ‘return the favour’ to help me out, with something I din’t really want help with.
So they were sort double favouring, faversing perhaps. Reversing the favour so that they gain again!
This time I got brave and declined their offer, but it was tricky.
It got me thinking.
How many times do we think we are helping someone but we really arent at all.
We maybe, in fact, helping ourselves, even if its just helping ourselves feel good.
So now I’m watching my favours.
Were they ever favours at all?
eleanor
Do you do real favours or faversing?
Now you are making words up and Jamuary isn't over yet 🤣
When I was in my 20s, someone I respected told me I was self absorbed. I thought to myself, "What is this person talking about? I do nice things for people all the time. I'm selfless!" But the truth was that I was a people pleaser. When I did things for others, it was often a manipulation to get them to think favorably of me - not because I wanted to help them.